The Leaves

I miss fall.

We recently called my sister-in-law to wish her a happy birthday. During the conversation she asked me what I miss the most about life in the States, which is a bittersweet question. I like it, because it makes me stop and think and reminisce. But after those thoughts and memories, I get a little sad, because, well, I'm reminded of those things that I miss, and I realize I won't experience them again for a long time.

My immediate answer to that question, which anyone could probably guess, is people—family and friends. More specifically, experiencing life with them. Cooking with my mom. Shopping with my mother-in-law. Hanging out at my sister-in-law's house while our kids run around on their land. Going to nephews' games. Meeting girlfriends for breakfast, dinner, or coffee. Worshipping with brothers and sisters at church.

But there are other things I miss that evoke strong feelings. One of them that is especially poignant at the moment is fall.

It's all over Facebook. It's in my inbox. Leaves, pumpkins, candles, candy corn, sweaters, scarves, boots, flannel, plaid, pies, pumpkin spice lattes, Halloween, Thanksgiving, football. I love it. And it makes me wistful.

I have vivid memories of fall leaves, most recently, in our neighborhood in DC, where I admired them on my morning runs and midmorning walks.

I also remember fall trips to Maine and Rhode Island and the beautiful colors the leaves treated us to there.

God has brought us to a place with no fall. My second-favorite season is winter, and that's MIA in Mozambique as well. Here we live in a perpetual summer-spring. We've had the privilege of traveling to some other countries that offer cool weather, but nowhere in Africa have we seen the colors of fall (oranges, golds, and crimsons) in leaves. As gorgeous as our tropical paradise is, it lacks autumn's warm colors and cool weather.

I share this because I want to be honest about some of the things that make missionary life (at least for me) challenging, things you might not think about or expect. I shared a bit of that in my previous post and our recent newsletter. As I told my sister-in-law, I miss shopping and eating out and going to coffee shops. More specifically, I miss Target and Mexican restaurants and Starbucks. I miss online shopping and the ability to have an order shipped directly to me. I miss driving. I miss anonymity, blending in. I miss wearing shorts and pants whenever I want, more generally the freedom to dress as I please (especially wearing all those cozy fall fashions).

We are by no means suffering because of any of these things. God knew when he brought us here that we would be fine without them. He has even given us other wonderful things that help make up for the things we miss (like the ocean view I'm enjoying right now as I type this from my living room couch, and the joy I experienced yesterday as I told six women the story of Abraham's calling). Nevertheless, at times we ache for home (or what still feels like home), which is certainly family and friends but there's so much more to it. We have given all of that up for a season, and it's ok. Time will tell whether the ache subsides over the months and years.

So those of you who live in autumn places, keep taking and sharing pictures of the leaves and selfies in scarves and hats. Keep posting about yummy pies and coffee drinks. Keep cheering on your football team (Boomer Sooner!). Enjoy fall. And when you're ready for summery blues and greens, enjoy our pics—even better, come see us!